9 days

Andrew took the week of Christmas off, and as a result, we got to spend 9 whole days together. And almost every single minute of those 9 days was spent side by side.

Me and Andrew... 9 days... side by side... with Jasper tagging along for the ride...
And after 12,960 minutes of being by Andrew's side constantly, I need to say the following things to my beloved:

beloved Andrew,
You are wonderful.

You are truly amazing.

The longer we're married, the more I am humbled by your love and the more I respect you. I'm humbled by your love for God and how seriously you yearn for Him, desire Him, and imitate Him. You have such a deep and passionate love for your Creator and you strive daily to live a Spirit-filled life that glorifies God and brings Him honor. This is not something I take lightly or for granted. It's something that I cherish and treasure, for I know that it's rare. And I know it's not easy. I know it takes a daily commitment to strive forward in your walk and I know it's something that you pursue above all other things; I'm so honored to be married to a man who loves and pursues our God so completely.

I'm humbled by your love for me. You love me so selflessly and so completely and so "fun-ly". You honor me with your words, you love me with your actions, you study me and relate to my interests. You are amazingly quick to close your eyes and turn your head when a skimpy woman comes on tv or walks past in the mall; and I know you don't just do it when I'm around. I know you turn your head even when you think I'm in a different room or not paying attention. You don't fake your integrity and moral purity; it's a real and true aspect of your character and one of the many ways you show your love for God and me.

Over our Christmas vacation, you made me feel beautiful. And let's face the facts: I'm as big as a barn, my fingers look like sausages, my wrists are so swollen I can't even latch my watch anymore, my ankles are but a distant memory, I waddle everywhere I go, I constantly have rivers of sweat racing down my face, I have a total of 2 pants that fit me, I only wear slip-on shoes b/c I can't bend down far enough to put on socks and boots, and my bangs are still recovering from their disastrous experience from 2 months ago. And yet you make me feel utterly gorgeous. We had several really beautiful waitresses at a few of our restaurants this past week and you didn't appear to notice them at all. In fact, you were actually rather abrupt with them, short in your answers, and didn't even look at them; but then you would turn to me and your face would light up like a Christmas tree as you talked and laughed and gave me your complete attention and affection.

That's one of the greatest gifts in the world that you could possibly give me and you give it to me daily, in our home and also in public where others witness your affection and love for me. Thank you, love. Remember when Heather Anderson approached me and told me that she loved watching you watch me during Sunday School and how any woman would give her life to have a man look at her the way you look at me? That was at least 5 years ago and you're still looking at me that same way today, when I'm 35 weeks pregnant and after 8 and a half years of marriage, 3 major surgeries, countless stupid fights, childbirth, motherhood, and the daily grind of life. I'm amazed at your love for me.

I don't mean to make you into a saint and make you feel like you can't make mistakes. You can. Please do. In fact, you certainly will. I want you to know that you have the freedom to make mistakes, to sin, to fall short, etc. Do not be perfect, do not feel like I want you to be perfect, feel no pressure to be flawless or a "super husband" or the "husband of the year". The last thing I want to do is make you feel pressure, honey, to be perfect. But right here, right now, I simply can't let another day go by without putting into words the amazing man you are and the depth of my love and respect for you.

So back to my main point. I love you. I love you so very much that my heart aches with the fullness and the richness and the overflowing depth of my love for you. I long to be in the same room with you. When you have to go to work (sigh), I'm like a school girl, watching the clock and counting the hours till you come home and I get to be with you again. I love so many things about you, many of them the "big" things in life (some listed above) but I also love so many of the little things about you, too.

For example, during our Christmas vacation, I simply love the following things about you:

I love that you call my fiestaware dishes by their official names (IE turquoise, scarlet, cobalt, lemongrass, flamingo, peacock, shamrock, etc) instead of simply "green, red, blue, yellow, pink, etc". I really appreciate that you stand with me in front of my Fiestaware cabinet and talk seriously with me about my colors and which side of the color wheel I need to buy my next dishes from in order to add a depth to my collection that I feel is missing.

I love that you got excited with me when I found steel cut oats at Yutzy's for $0.79/lb and you didn't bat an eye when I bought almost every single bag off the shelf b/c I was afraid someone else would come swooping in and buy my steel cut oats.

I love how much fun you have while playing with Jasper. And by the way, boy do you sure play with our little guy. You don't just play with him for 15 minutes then check your phone to see the newest deals on your "deal site". You play with Jasper, with no phone or tablet or computer present, for hours and hours at a time. You get down on his level and play and play and play with him; I often wonder how you can go so long playing with Jasper without going bonkers, as I often do.

I love your accessories. I love that you love your hats and scarves and vests and boy, you sure do look quite handsome in them, too.

I love your excitement with our fantasy football teams. I love that we talk at great length and in great detail about not only both of our teams but also both of our opponents' teams and we teach jasper to who to cheer for so we might get a shot at winning our game. :o) I love our football fever that we share together.

I love that you still hold my hand every time we watch tv.

I especially love that one evening on our vacation, I asked you if you could let me know when you have time to do me a favor and you dropped what you were doing and instantly responded, "Honey, I always have time to do favors for you. How can I help you?" It blew my mind that you were so quick to serve me. Thank you.

I love that you didn't bat an eye when I ripped off my heart monitor and threw it against the wall and then sat down and bawled for an hour. You gently and patiently held me and stroked my hair and then never spoke a word about the monitor again (smart, smart man).

I love that you are serious about getting our family to church on time. It's obviously a priority to you and Jasper is learning its importance, too. And I quite love listening to you read the Bible to me and Jasper.

I love how sweetly conscientious you are about making sure our special restaurants have calamari as an appetizer simply because you know how much I love calamari and crave it deep in my soul. I love the thoughtful and sweet gifts you got me for Christmas and the special gifts you got me in my stocking (*wink*). You are so considerate and thoughtful when shopping for me and it's so evident. Thank you, honey.

I really, really love your laugh. I love your eyes and your sense of humor and your quick, dry wit and the way you attempt to tell stories. There were a few other things I wanted to list, but I'm getting sleepy (I think it's the Sleepy Time Tea kickin' in) and I can't think of them right now. But when I do, I'll be sure to tell ya.

Sweetie, you are such an amazing man. I am daily humbled by your love and commitment to God and our family and after spending almost every minute of the last 9 days with you, my respect for you has sky-rocketed. When we married, I knew I was marrying an amazing man, but boy, I was barely scratching the surface. There's a depth to your character and integrity that's extremely rare to come by and I thank the Lord daily that you choose me, pursued me, and stuck with me. You blow my mind, babe, and rock my world and I'm so honored and excited to spend all the rest of my days with you. Thank you for your love.

such a glorious Christmas!!

Our Christmas was just so, so sweetly glorious; we spent much time talking about and worshiping Jesus and the redemption for sins that He offers as well as much cooking, eating, playing, giving gifts, playing with gifts, a special Christmas dinner with 10 people, etc. We had the most wonderful time ever!! We are so blessed and my heart is just constantly overflowing with thanks to God for everything- for the inheritance He gives, for our family and friends, for the sweetness of a simple life, for the joy Andrew and I get when we spend time together, for our precious little boy who loves to play with "all-uh-us-all-tugever" (all of us, all together), and for our little baby ninja.

A few quick pics from our Christmas:

We got Jasper a huge "monster dump truck" that he's been yearning for! Andrew and I were like little kids with all our excitement in giving it to him!

 We weren't disappointed! Jasper's crazy about it!!

I love his constant bedhead.

 We also got him a lifetime supply of altoids. We gave J one of them and told him he could eat them whenever he wanted without having to ask our permission. He couldn't believe it! On Christmas day, at any given point in time, J had 10 altoids stuffed in his mouth. Dream come true for him.

Also got him Playdough, which he loves!

my fav pic of Jasper from Christmas morning! He's getting ready to throw one of my Playdough "worm's eyes" at Andrew.... note the mischievous grin. :o)

 He's LOVES his blue firetruck! It rocked his world that there were different colors of firetrucks. 

 Tic-tacs... another love of J's. :o)

 A few days ago, J colored Andrew a bunch of purple pumpkins for his stocking.

Oh my gracious, my heart just bursts with the blessing of these two boys!!!

Coloring special pictures for our Christmas dinner guests. 

 We had Drew, Melissa, my mom and dad, my brother Cade, his friend Janille, and Andrew's friend and co-worker Prabakaran over for Christmas dinner. 

It was such a special, special time! We had appetizers, Andrew read Scripture and shared the "why" of why Christ came to earth, clearly gave the gospel, we ate, we talked, we laughed, we prayed, we talked, and we laughed some more. It was such a precious time!

"And she shall bear a son, and you shall call his name Jesus, for he shall save his people from their sins." Matt. 1:21

Praise God! What amazing love the Father has for us!

dead phone

just an fyi- my phone died about 24 hours ago and I'm completely out of commission. Boo. The best way to reach me would be by email, fb, or calling Andrew's phone.

I had to laugh when I was talking with andrew tonight, because I told him that I felt completely out of touch with the world since my phone was dead; but then I realized that I had been on 1.) our computer 2.) my tablet and 3.) my ipod all day today and realized that when it's all said and done, I have actually been quite "in touch" with the world today. :o) What did people do before the internet? :o)

*** I've been on said electronics mainly to follow closely the Duck Dynasty controversy. This is rockin' my world ***

a few updates

Life has been so sweetly full these past few weeks!!

We had such a wonderful trip down to Georgia for Thanksgiving, the Taft Christmas, and Liz's wedding; what a precious, precious time it was! The wedding was gorgeous, Thanksgiving was precious, seeing Danny and Bridget and meeting Jackson was such a privilege, and spending time with the Meades was just so special.

 (the gorgeous bride)

(all the Meades)

 (getting together with our dear, dear friends Danny and Bridget)

(and we got to meet D and B's son, Jackson, which was so special!)

Then we had Andrew's birthday on Dec. 5th, his special birthday date on the 7th, my cardiologist appointment on the 10th I believe, the Weston Family Christmas Retreat this past weekend from the 13th-15th, my birthday on the 17th, my echo-cardiogram is tomorrow on the 19th, my special birthday date is on the 21st, then Christmas!! Whew!! What a precious, precious month this has been!

But let me back up a few days... Andrew's birthday. Super, super fun! I had such a blast celebrating him, his life, and honoring the amazing man that he is. And of the 3 of us, Jasper was the most excited for Andrew's birthday (and that's saying a lot, because I was pretty super excited myself). He kept spinning in circles all day, yelling, "HAPPY BIRDAY DADDAAAAAA!!!!" at the top of his lungs, even though Andrew was at work. It was so incredibly precious!!!

(andrew's ice cream cake)

Andrew's special birthday date included free babysitting from our dear friends, the Clausons, while Andrew and I chowed down at Rodizio, a Brazilian Steakhouse, and watched the Bucks play the Big 10 Championship (which did not go well for the good ole buckeyes... sniff sniff).

Next up- my cardiologist appointment. You all have been so, so incredibly sweet to send texts, emails, etc about this appointment. A sum up- the EKG looked great with no problems, which is a huge praise. The doctor thinks based on my symptoms and family history that I'm having heart palpitations due to either an electrical or structural short circuit in my heart. So tomorrow I go in for an echo-cardiogram to check out the structure of my heart and I'm currently wearing a heart monitor for 30 days to record the electrical functions of my heart. Hopefully it the doc will quickly find the prob and be able to fix it easily!

Weston Family Christmas Retreat- It can be summed up in one word= amazing! My parents rented out an entire Bed and Breakfast just for our immediate family and we all had the wonderful privilege of staying there, together, from Fri afternoon- Sunday noonish. It was such a blast and such a special treat! I especially loved watching Jasper play and interact with his cousins, aunts, and uncles and I loved the fact that no one had to leave. We all just got to stay and hang out and enjoy each others' company for an extended period of time.

(our b&b)

(all the Weston cousins)

(playing with his new excavator in the bubbles)

 (jasper had the world's most bubbly bubble bath, much to his delight)

(A lil' bit of christmas lovin')

 (all the Westons)

My birthday... oh. my. goodness. Between my family having a party for me at our "Christmas Retreat" this last weekend and Andrew, I am completely spoiled! Andrew obviously had to work on my birthday, but he did so much behind-the-scenes work to ensure that every moment of my day was special. It was incredible. I had special meals, special decorations, a gourmet delivery by a real delivery man, Andrew lined up a babysitter to watch Jasper so I could go to Starbucks by myself for the afternoon, Andrew got my favorite special meal for dinner (Potato Ranch pizza from Romeos) and made me a homemade birthday cake, etc. It was just the most glorious day ever! And to top it off, Jasper was just SO excited the whole day and kept spinning in circles, yelling, "HAPPY BIRDAY MOMMA!!!!" the whole time! :o)

 (Jasper and I got cake pops from Starbucks on my birthday to celebrate)

 (my edible arrangement that Andrew had delivered to me!)

(my ho-ho cake!!)

Tomorrow's the echo, Sat's my special birthday date, Tue's Christmas eve, Wed's Christmas, then we have nothing on the schedule until little ninja baby decides to make his appearance. :o) Either at or before thur, Jan. 30th. We are just so blessed by the Lord with all the amazing family, friends, and gifts He's given us and we're just havin' the time of our lives! 

please freeze!!!

This evening, our dinner tonight, this moment... I want to freeze forever. It's such a precious life. My heart is going to burst with how sweet and precious and wonderful tonight is.

All 3 of us are singing and dancing our hearts out to blue ridge gospel music.

Andrew and Jasper are playing basketball in the kitchen while I'm washin' up some dishes.

We're dancin' with moves like Jagger and cheerin' each other on as we launch basketballs and fake lemons and limes into our "hoop".

I just want to freeze this forever.

Life can't possibly get sweeter than this moment.

sweet adventure

Life with Jasper is turning into one sweet adventure. I never know what's going to happen next or what he'll say next and I often find myself blinking a lot in response to his comments. Each day is so sweet and so fun with this little one and I want to do a better job of recording some of our conversations; the days go fast and I don't want to forget how precious they were.

For example:
- The other day, I went in Jasper's room to get him out of bed in the morning and as soon as I opened the door, he said so urgently and tenderly:
"I sowwy momma! Will ya pwease fo'give me?"
me- blink... blink..."Sure buddy! Of course I forgive you!! But... why are you asking?" (at this point, i'm experiencing much fear and trepidation. I'm actually breaking into a cold sweat b/c he has NEVER asked me to forgive him on his own. I'm imagining the worst. Fires, floods, permanent home or bodily damage, a tiger he's been secretly hiding under his bed for the last year, a mail-ordered bride, etc, etc, etc.)
Jasper- "baber was bein' mean to da tag on his pujjies."
me- "you were being mean to the tag on the back of your pj's?"
Jas- "Des. I so sowwy, momma. Will ya pwease fo'give me?"
And it was at this point that my heart completely melted.


- Today, I walked in Jasper's room to get him out of bed this morning, and as soon as I opened the door, he said quite urgently (and quite out of nowhere):
"Momma! When baber is a beeeeeg, hooooge boy. Not a tiiiiiiiny lillllte boy. But when Baber is a beeeeeeg, hooooge boy like dadda is, when Baber is a hoooge boy, can Baber buy ah duck baby?"
me- blink... blink... "You want to buy a duck baby?" (thinking- where on earth is this coming from?!)
Jasper- "not when baber is a littlelele tiiiiny boy. When Baber is a beeeeeeg, hoooooge boy like Dadda is. Maybe da guy will buy Baber a littlelelele tiny duck baby."
me- "when you're a big, huge boy like daddy, you want to buy a duck baby?"
Jasper- "Des. Maybe da guy will buy da duck baby for Baber."
me- "Um.. that's a really good question, buddy. How 'bout I talk to daddy about the duck baby?"
Jasper- "Oh dank you!!!"

- this afternoon, I was telling Jasper that Uncle Cade just bought a house and he doesn't have very many chairs or tables or rugs and maybe we could look for things to give uncle cade for his new house. Jasper tilted his head to the side, thought about it for a minute, and said,
"How 'bout yo' gib (give) Unca Cade yor preddy dresses so he can gib them to his momma?"
me- "umm.... that's so sweet buddy, but I like my pretty dresses."
Jasper- "des. but maybe he needs ta gib them to his momma instead."
me- blink. blink. "umm..."

- this evening, I'm mixing up a huge bowl of manacoti stuffing (the kind with 4 gourmet cheeses, fresh cut spinach, egg, seasonings, etc) and as I'm mixing, deep in thought, out of nowhere, a basketball lands in my bowl of manacoti. Blink... blink... then I hear,
"Oh DAT'S CWAZY!!!" and Jasper starts laughing hysterically. And I couldn't resist laughing as well. Being the germ-conscientious woman that I am (not!), I threw the basketball back to J and kept on cookin'.

I love this stage so much! it just keeps getting better and better... and I'm pretty sure this is just the beginning of our adventures. :o) Take a deep breath and hang on. :o)

Jasper talks

Jasper talks. A lot. As in, if he's not asleep, his body and his mouth are moving nonstop.

It's really fun (most of the time :o)) and he's at the stage where he's constantly saying little cute things without realizing each. Each day, I think to myself that I should be writing these cute little sayings down, and each day, i forget.

For example, this morning I was in the kitchen holding a mug of hot chocolate, and Jasper pitter-patters his way into the kitchen, takes a look at me, and with grave concern says,

"Be dareful, momma. Dat's weally fwagile."

I literally laughed out loud. Thanks, buddy. :o)

On a side note, thank you all for your sweet, sweet concern over my possible health issue! I've received such kinds emails, fb messages, and texts from you all expressing your sweet concern! I have an appointment with a cardiologist specialist this Thur at 7:40 so hopefully we can learn what (if anything) is causing my episodes. Thanks again for all your kindness!

rough day

oh what a rough day we're having today. Some small things, some big things.

- Jasper got the flu vaccine yesterday and is suffering the side effects today. In other words, uncontrollable bawling. all. day. long.
- Jasper having temper tantrums on top of bawling.
- me disciplining Jasper for his temper tantrums which results in Jasper having prolonged screaming on top of the uncontrollable bawling. literally, all day long. Which eventually turns into temper tantrums. Which leads to discipline. It appears to be an unending cycle.
- messy house
- dirty dishes
- no clean laundry
- got in a car accident (very minor) this morn on the way home from prenatal appointment. Baby and I are fine. but, the car accident (my fault) led to...
- uncontrollable bawling on my part.
- I've been experiencing some possibly serious health issues. I thought they were due to high blood pressure issues with the pregnancy, but I found out this morning at my prenatal appointment that it appears to be possibly a heart murmur with potential health risks to the baby. I'll hopefully be seeing a cardiologist specialist asap.
- My possible heart murmur, potential health risks to baby, minor car accident, and screaming toddler have very successfully combined to make me bawl. all day long, too.

At lunch, we were reading verses and my go-to chapter when having a rough day is Psalm 34. I love it; it always balms my soul and points me in the direction of my Savior. So naturally, we read this chapter aloud several times during lunch and it's just so awesome. God is so good!

"Oh taste and see that the Lord is good; blessed is the man who takes refuge in Him." Psalm 34:8