All boy

Jasper is all boy.
I don't just mean that he is of the male gender.
I mean, he. is. ALLLLLL. boy.
As in, every fiber of his being simply oozes "boyness".
He looks like a boy.
He smells like a boy.
He eats like a boy, talks like a boy, acts like a boy, thinks like a boy, plays like a boy, drinks like a boy, laughs like a boy, and moves like a boy.

It is so precious, and I of course would never have it any other way.
But this week in particular, I've been struck by his "boyness". And I've also been struck with how I never know what's going to come out of his mouth next. Never.

For example:

On Tuesday morning, I went into his room to get him up for the day, and before I even had the door all the way open, he said (and this is word for word):

"Momma, momma!!! Wast night, I fought (thought) I saw a hyena in my room, so I got my swords and wrapped all dis stuff around dem to make dem wike fire swords and I made dem extwa dangerwous and i put on my superhero cape and I jumped out of bed wif my fire swords and started growling and I took my fire swords and I KILLED da hyena wif dem and i kept killin' and killin' da hyena to make sure da hyena was dead and I made sure dat da fire was comin' outta da swords and I kept growling because I needed to protect Brody from da hyenas because dey was gonna hurt brody and I woke brody up when I was growling but I kept growlin anyways because I had to protect Brody but den I realized dat it wasn't a hyena. Actually, it was just a block. So i got back up into bed."

and then later in the day on Tuesday, I went in to get Jasper up from nap time (I should preface this by saying that Jasper and Grandma found a dead squirrel in the back yard earlier that afternoon and he was kinda flat and grandma said that maybe it was because his body was starting to lose water)  and Jasper said, before the door was even open all the way:

"Momma, when da squirrels cwimb up wealllllly high in da trees and den dey fall outta da trees and dey bonk deir (their) heads on da gwound, HOW ON EARF does all da water come outta da squirrels body? How??? And why do dey even have da water in deir (their) bodies? Where does da water go? Do da squirrels need da water when dey are dead? What will dey dwink when dey are dead???? And when dey die, do dey go to heaben to live wif God forever or do dey go to hell to live wifout God forever?"

And a particular "blink. blink. blink" moment happened on sunday afternoon. We were at church, eating lunch with the Pastors and some elders and some other "new visitors" to the church (it was a "get-to-know-you" lunch). Jasper was a few seats down from me, and we were all sitting right next to an elder and his wife. Jasper is eating a lemon poppy seed muffin, when all of a sudden, he pipes up pretty loudly, holds up a poppy seed, and says:

"Momma, what's dis?"
and I said, "It's a poppy seed. It's kind of like a spice or a seasoning that you can put on muffins and things like that."

and by now, naturally, the elder and his wife are listening to us.

and Jasper replies, "Oh. I'm just gonna pretend wike it's a frog egg that is full of baby tadpoles. And I'm gonna chomp em all up wif my teeth and make sure dey are all dead and I'm gonna suck em down into my stomach wike dis (and proceeds to make this loud, awful sucking sound with his teeth and lips and spit) and I'm gonna have dead. baby tadpoles in my belly but dey are not gonna be swimmin' around because dey are gonna be dead."

and the elder, his wife, and everyone else at the table looks back at me.

me- blink. blink. blink.....

and then, "umm... (clear throat)... umm... ok buddy."
(lol! what else could I say?!? I console myself with the thought that this particular elder has 9 children, 7 of which are boys, so I'm sure he and his wife have heard it all.)

Oh, boy. He is boy. He is ALL BOY. and he is delightful. and ornery. and totally mischievous. But mainly delightful.