my dearest, future Jasper

Dearest (future) Jasper,

If you ever wonder how much a I love you, rest assured... I love you a lot. A ton, in fact! Quite possibly, I'll love you more than you ever know, and I mean that seriously. I love you to the moon and back, times infinity. I love you with all my heart and soul and would gladly give my life to make sure you're safe, warm, well-fed, and loved.

By now, you're probably a wonderful teenager, one who's intelligent and creative and smart and courageous and loving and brave and athletic and social and talkative. And you're kind... Even from the youngest of ages, you have been so kind-hearted (that was displayed yet again today, at the Chick-fil-a play place as you kindly told a bully that he wasn't being kind to your little brother. And then you kindly told him to stop. And he more or less obeyed you.) You're so kind.

You're probably the heart and soul of every room you walk into and you're the social guy, the one who gets invited to parties and the one in whom people confide in. I pray that you'll love God fiercely and that His Word will be your starting point and your ending point in all things pertaining to life and death.

But you may also get upset with me (I'm sure this will happen from time to time) because I won't let you do something that you want to do or b/c I'm making you do something that you hate.

And in this moment, when you're upset with me and thinking to yourself, "Does my mom even love me?"

I want you to read the following and then adamantly tell yourself, "YES! A million times YES! My mom loves me like crazy." And this is how you know that I love you like crazy:

Within the last 3 days, I've been down on my hands and knees, cleaning up poop for you.

While this doesn't sound too extraordinary, future Jasper, let me remind you...

At the Kells house on Saturday night, you found several big, squishy green caterpillars. You instantly fell in love with them because your heart is as big as Montana, so Mrs. Kell got you a tupperware and you put your caterpillars in it. Several hours later, as we were leaving the Kells, you dropped the tupperware, the lid came flying off, and the caterpillars and an amazing amount of poop came flying out all over Mrs. Kell's beautiful rug. I drop to my knees, gently retrieve your caterpillars, and then continue to clean up their poop for you. I thought this was the end of the caterpillar story.

Nope.

Today, I ran upstairs to grandma and grandpa's house to throw the swim suits and towels that we used at the Kells house into the washing machine. As I put them in the washer, a random tupperware that I was unaware of flew out of one of the towels and into their kitchen. The lid flew off, caterpillars flew out, and poop flew everywhere (sorry, mom!). I instantly stop what I'm doing, drop to my knees, gently return your caterpillars to their tupperware home, and start cleaning up their poop. For the 2nd time.

Why on earth, 2 times in 3 days, did I drop to my knees, care for these pests that so totally gross me out, and clean up poop?? Not even your poop, mind you. Not even your brother's poop. Your caterpillars' poop. Why did I do these things?

Because, my darling son, I love you, body and soul.

I forgot!

I can't believe I forgot to include the weirdest thing that I said yesterday in yesterday's blog post! It was the whole impetus for the blog post in the first place.

After lunch yesterday, we took the boys to the Dollar Store so Jasper could use his chore money to buy something. After we had checked out, Andrew and the boys had walked out of the store and I was close behind them when a lady came up to me and said, "You really have quite a lot of unflattering cheek hair. Here's my card, I just opened my own salon. Come on in and i'll thread it for you for only $25."

me- blink. blink...  Totally taken aback and surprised that a stranger was talking to me, I randomly thought she meant that my bangs were long and were brushing up against my cheek a lot and needed a trim, but I couldn't quite process her words. So I said, "Excuse me... what?"

and she said, "Your cheek hair! The hair on your cheeks. It's really unflattering.. You have quite blond cheek hair that clashes a lot with your skin tone and you really need to get it threaded and removed. Come to my salon and I'll thread your cheek hair for you. It really looks awful."

me-......blink........blink.... blinking some more whilst simultaneously rubbing my cheeks, trying to see if I somehow missed the fact that i'm growing a beard........... and I'm still blinking in a kind of baffled manner....

the lady said "Everyone gets their cheek hair threaded! It's the most unflattering thing on your face and it's SOO noticeable! You really need to get it threaded and I'll give you a discount, too!"

me- "um... Thanks anyway, but I really don't mind having cheek hair."

lady- "are you sure? It's really unflattering with the men. Trust me, they'll be MUCH more into you if you don't have such unflattering cheek hair."

me- "um... Well, I'm married. And I'm pretty sure my husband doesn't mind my cheek hair... I guess I haven't really asked him before, but I really don't think he minds it. I certainly don't mind having cheek hair... it's kind of a part of my face. I'll talk with my husband."

lady- "ok, but you really need to have your cheek hair removed."

me- "Ok, thanks anyways, but I'm pretty fond of my cheek hair. I think I'll keep it."

at which point, I thought to myself, "did those words really come out of my mouth?!"

I walk outside to my guys and turn to Andrew and say, "Hey hon. Do you mind the fact that I have cheek hair?"

Andrew- blink..... blink..... blinking in confusion, thinking to himself that this has got to be a trick question....

And that's when I started laughing. It was one of those days.

So... to recap. Weird things I said yesterday:
1. "Aww.. Thanks for saying I don't look like death! That's so sweet of you!"
2. "Don't snort like a pig and don't pick your nose. I love you! Have fun!"
3. "I think it's beef, but maybe it's pork. I thought it would be deep fried, but it's floating around in this green stuff instead. But it's really good!"
4. "I'm pretty fond of my cheek hair. It's kind of a part of my face. I think I'll keep it."
5. "Wait! Who packs heat in their diaper bag?!"

weird things

Several times today, a weird statement has come out of my mouth.

For example:

As I was getting ready for church this morning, I told Andrew, "I feel like I look like death." and he said, "nah, you don't look like death." to which I replied, "aww! Thanks for saying I don't look like death!! That's so sweet of you!" We apparently have a low bar for compliments around here. ;o)
#marriedfor10years #reallife

Then during church, Jasper was walking out to go to his Stepping Stones program, and I hurriedly whispered as he was leaving, "Remember, don't snort like a pig and don't pick your nose. I love you! Have fun!" You know... just covering the basics.

Then at the restaurant for lunch, when they delivered my meal Mom Meade said, "oohh! What did you get?" to which I replied, "I think its beef. But maybe it's pork... I'm not really sure which meat it is. I thought it would be deep fried, but it's floating in this green stuff instead. But it's really good!" Nothin' like knowing what you're putting in your body.

And lastly, at the Women's Ministry Kickoff at church tonight, I was sitting at the table with all my besties (minus Wauhop) when all of a sudden I hear them chatting about something very interesting, and I jump in with, "Wait! Who packs heat in their diaper bag?!" and sure 'nough, one of my girlfriends at church packs heat in her diaper bag. I thought for sure I misheard, but nope. I pity the fool in gets in the way of this momma!

daily devo's

My dear sister-in-law, Mary Brantley, is writing a blog.

Let me clarify 2 points in that opening statement:

1. To call her my sister-in-law isn't really accurate anymore; it's less like sister-in-law and more like adopted sister and very close friend, mother to dear Henderson and auntie to Jasper and Brody.

2. Her blog is wonderful. I love it. I stalk it. and I crave it.

Anyway, she's writing a truly wonderful blog and asked me if I could send her an email about my daily devo time, because her next blog is about how women in different stages of life do their devo's. I typed her out an email about my devo's, sent it off, and then realized, with MB's encouragement, that I should totally put that email on here, so that I can always remember what my daily devo's looked like at this stage of life, "this stage" meaning having a husband as a full-time grad student with 2 part-time jobs, a very unpredictable daily schedule due to his constantly changing school/work schedule, and 2 precious little boys who are home with me all day.

So... here's the real, unedited version of my email to MB:

Hi dearest MB! Here's my devo set-up:

Because of Andrew's unique school schedule, he normally doesn't get home until very late at night and I always wait up for him. So we end up typically being up very late at night and then sleeping in until the children wake up in the morning. I'm the type of person who needs the Bible soon after waking, so it has been hard for me not start the day right off with my devo's, like I used to. But... the Lord has helped me figure out a new routine which is wonderful! Shortly after the boys wake up, Brody goes down for his morning nap and that's when I turn on Jasper's 2 shows for the day. 

While Jasper watches his first show on the computer, I curl up in my favorite chair with my coffee and pray, "open my eyes that I might behold wondrous truths from thy law." and then read through my next chapter of Isaiah. I read through it a few times, then I pull out my expositional commentary that I use to supplement my bible reading and read what that author says about the chapter I read. I write notes in the margin of my bible and read through the chapter a few more times. Pastor Kent said that when we do daily devo's, don't stop reading until you have a nugget of truth to hold onto for that day. So I read and re-read and re-re-read until I have a nugget of truth to apply to my day.

At this point, Jasper normally races into the living room announcing that his show is over and asking if I can start his 2nd show.

After I start his 2nd show, I got back to my chair, curl up, and pray. I love starting my prayer time by praying attributes of God that I read about in my Isaiah chapter. Then I love just being quiet before God. Then I do confession, begging the Lord to make my heart sensitive to my sin. Then thanksgiving. Lots and lots of thanksgiving. Then supplication- mainly begging the Lord to keep me from sin, to help me in my pursuit of holiness and humility. Asking that He give me a high view of God and a low view of self. Then I pray these things for Andrew. Then I beg the Lord to not return until my little boys are saved and that they be boys, young men, and old men who love the Lord and love His law.

Jasper's 2nd show is normally finished by now, and I normally want to keep on praying. so recently, I've started letting him watch a 3rd show so I can keep praying. so then I pray some more.

That's about it. If I know that we have morning plans and Brody will have to skip his morning nap (meaning that I can't do devo's at that time), I bite the bullet and get up early. Today, I selfishly slept in, knowing that we were going to be gone all day. And it was awful. I missed my time with the Lord a lot and I was a total brat to andrew all morning until the Lord sweetly convicted me.

Oh yes! i'm almost done with Isaiah, which makes me so sad b/c I've enjoyed it immensely. But I always ask Andrew to pick my next book of the Bible to do my devo's in, because I think it's so, so important for wives to be disciples of their husbands.So he's choosing my next book of the Bible along with the commentary (I think this commentary will be by Dale Ralph Davis).